I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Classic 1990 Film: A Candid Conversation.
The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an iconic tough guy. However, in the midst of his cinematic dominance in the late 20th century, he also headlined several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this winter.
The Role and That Line
In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a tough police officer who poses as a elementary educator to catch a killer. During the film's runtime, the procedural element functions as a basic structure for the star to film humorous scenes with children. The most unforgettable belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and informs the actor, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “I appreciate the insight.”
The young actor was played by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role featured a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the famous sisters and the character of the resurrected boy in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with multiple films listed on his IMDb. He also is a regular on popular culture events. He recently recalled his recollections from the filming of the classic after all this time.
A Young Actor's Perspective
Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?
Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.
That's impressive, I don't recall being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?
Yeah, somewhat. They're brief images. They're like visual recollections.
Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?
My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was a mass tryout. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there briefly, read a small part they wanted and that was it. My parents would help me learn the words and then, when I became literate, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.
Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?
He was incredibly nice. He was enjoyable. He was good-natured, which I suppose makes sense. It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a positive atmosphere. He was fun to be around.
“It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”
I understood he was a huge celebrity because I was told, but I had not actually watched his movies. I sensed the excitement — he was a big deal — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was merely entertaining and I was eager to interact with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd tense up and we'd be hanging off. He was incredibly giving. He gifted all the students in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was like an iPhone. That was the hottest tech out there, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It finally gave out. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.
Do you remember your days on set as being enjoyable?
You know, it's interesting, that movie was this cultural thing. It was a major production, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the direction of Ivan Reitman, the location shoot, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a finitely child at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was brand new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would bring me their Game Boys to pass certain levels on games because I was able to, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all childhood recollections.
The Line
OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember anything about it? Did you understand the words?
At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word taboo meant, but I understood it was edgy and it got a big laugh. I knew it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given approval in this case because it was comedic.
“It was a difficult decision for her.”
How it was conceived, according to family lore, was they didn't have specific roles. Certain bits of dialogue were written into the script, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they developed it during shooting and, presumably the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Let me think about it, let me sleep on it" and took a day or two. She really wrestled with it. She said she was hesitant, but she felt it could end up as one of the most memorable lines from the movie and history proved her correct.
